Love me, even though I can’t love you back.

I was meditating this morning and as I was just about to conclude, I heard a friend’s voice (in my mind) say to me: “Love me, even though I can’t love you back.”

This particular friend has been distant and aloof with me and it’s been a challenge to know how to be in relation to her.

And even though I’m not sure yet of what actions to take externally, her words helped me to remember to stay loving inside of myself, despite the discord that lies between us.

Her words also inspired the following blog post, that i thought I’d share with all of you.

Love me, even though I can’t love you back.

Sometimes in our lives there are people who choose not to love us or simply can’t love us (or be loving toward us), because of where they are at inside of themselves. Rather than take this personally and be offended and hurt, can we find the place in ourselves that can remain loving, even in the face of others anger or apathy or indifference or inconsiderate behaviour?

This is one of the great challenges set before each one of us, to learn to love those who can’t love us back.

In this crazy world of ours this is no easy task, and we are at best very imperfect at it. But if we are truly to open our hearts then we must aspire to love, not only those who love and approve of us, but also those who are cold, or angry, or arrogant, or aloof, or those who feel superior to us as well.

So, let this be your challenge today, to learn to keep your heart open even in the face of those who can’t love you back. This, of course, does not mean you need to put yourself in harms way, sometimes, its best to love others from afar.

Take a moment now and direct love towards someone who can’t love you back.


I love you.
I love you.

I value you.
I value you.

You are learning and you are growing.
Everyone is learning and everyone is growing.

I appreciate you.
I appreciate you.

I forgive you.
I forgive you.

I love you.
I love you.

Be aware of how this softens your heart. Be aware of how this shifts your energy.

Let this be your challenge today: to send love to someone who doesn’t treat you well or can’t (at this time) love you back.

As you grow in your ability to do this, your heart chakra will open and you will be able to manifest more of your best self.

After you have opened your heart you can ask: Given what is, what is the loving thing to do? You can listen deeply within and let your inner wisdom guide you in right relation.

Sometimes it is loving to love from afar and sometimes it is loving to love up close. Sometimes it is loving to say yes and sometimes it is loving to say no. Sometimes it is loving to give other people the space that they need. Sometimes it is loving to come close. Sometimes it is loving to give other people freedom to choose and not force our own will or desires on them. Sometimes its loving to value ourselves enough to walk away. Sometimes its loving to let other people just be. Sometimes its loving to ask for more. Sometimes its loving to ask for less. Sometimes its loving to challenge the status quo. Sometimes its loving to express and sometimes its loving to remain silent.

The individual attunement will vary. It is through deep listening that we will know how to best express the love that is in our hearts.

But for today, simply work on opening your heart chakra. Do this for yourself, so that you can be the best that you can be. Be aware of how this impacts your life and your manifestation.

Ask yourself:

What changes as you become a more loving person?
What percentage of your day can you stay in love?
Can you appreciate this adversary in your life for teaching you how to love in a deeper way?
What else can you appreciate about this person?
What else are you learning from this challenge?

You can simplify the affirmation I shared above by simply stating:

I love you.
I love you.
I love you.

You can silently say this to yourself and silently say it to others all day long.

Be aware of what impact this has on you and your relationships.

Some relationships may improve with this affirmation of love, and some, which are no longer appropriate for you, may find their good elsewhere. Sometimes nothing will change externally but your own internal environment will be transformed.

One thing we can say for sure, is that the affirmation, I love you, will raise your own vibration and help you to bring your best self forward more and more. Be aware of the far reaching impact this can have on your health, your relationships and on your own life as well.

Hayley Mermelstein

P.S. We will be having our monthly free TRCB teleclass this Sunday, November 29th at 7 p.m. This is a great opportunity to join with a group for the purpose of balancing your chakras and bringing your best self forward more and more.

To join our call, simply call: 413-259-8048 at 6:55 or so, on Sunday evening. The lines will be muted, so all you need to do is sit back and relax and allow the opening meditation and TRCB healing to wash over you and bring you whatever healing and transformation you need at this time. Feel free to forward this email to a friend in need as well.

I look forward to joining you on the call!

For those who would like to have access to our recording page, you can join our subscription program by signing up here:

Imperfect Hearts

Sometimes it is hard to see the perfection beneath the humanity.
Sometimes it is hard to see the beauty that lies within.

But I will aspire to see the true you.

The you beneath the gruff and the huff.
The you beneath the defensiveness.

I love you with an imperfect heart.

But I will aspire to remember that you are beautiful and you that are good and that you are learning and that you are afraid and that you are wounded, just like everyone else.

I love you with an imperfect heart.

But I will aspire to know that at your core you mean well, and that you want to be loving and be loved, and that you want to be a radiant being upon the earth.

I love you with an imperfect heart.

But I will aspire, to remember who I am and how I want to be in the world, and to see your imperfections with a kind eye and a gentle heart.

I love you with an imperfect heart and that is okay, because we are all learning and we are all growing and we are all perfection becoming more perfect.

I love you with an imperfect heart.

~Hayley Mermelstein

P.S. Have a nice Thanksgiving everyone.

Also, we are having our FREE TRCB TELECLASS the last Sunday of every month. Be sure to join us on the call Sunday November 29th, 2015 at 7 p.m. I’ll send out call in information next Saturday!

How Can I Help?

I was meditating Friday morning and this short prayer (question) started going through my head. I wrote it down but wasn’t planning on sending it since it seemed sort of personal to me. But in light of everything going on in our world I decided I would share it in case it offers some inspiration to you as well.

How may I help?

How can I offer a greater contribution?
How can I share my work in a bigger way?
How can I assist in raising consciousness?

How may I help?

How can I help others more while remaining true to myself?
How can I offer more without getting taken advantage of?
How can I help others with out overstepping or intruding?

How may I help?

What do I need to let go of so that I may step into greater contribution?

How may I help?

Spirit please use me for your highest good.

There is so much suffering here on earth and so much to learn as well.

Use me as an agent of your love.

Help me to raise my own consciousness so that I may do what I’ve come here to do.

Help me to raise consciousness so that we can all make choices that are in alignment of our highest good.

Help me to raise consciousness on the planet so that there can be greater peace and on the earth.

Help me to offer my full contribution.
Show me the way.

May I be a vehicle for the light.

Show me how I can help.

~Hayley Mermelstein

I’m good, right?

He was 5 years old and is one of the loves of my life. We were playing together outside on a hot summer day while his 4 years old sister tried fruitlessly to carry her bucket of water to some unknown destination.

I say to the 5 year old, maybe we should go help your sister, it looks like she having trouble carrying her bucket. I say it in such a way to help him feel like the big boy that I know he wants to be.

And as we are walking to meet her, he stops, turns to me and asks in the most sincere of voices, “I’m good, right”.

And it’s a real question, and I know that it is an important moment.

And, I turn and I look him in the eyes and I say, yes, you are very good. And he looks at me and smiles and nods, as if to say, I thought so, I just needed to make sure. And I see him take my words in and he is relieved.

But his question hits me hard because I see a five year old who is teetering on the edge of losing the knowing that he is good, and although my answer temporarily reassures him, I know it won’t be enough to battle the forces that will be coming: the well meaning but over worked teachers, sleep deprived parents, young friends and adversaries, not to mention societal expectations.

But what can I do in this moment but tell him he is good?

Five years pass and that little boy is 10 years old now and I can tell he is forgetting what he once knew, and I want to whisper in his ear: You are good. You are good. Don’t forget, you are good.

But I can’t quite yet, because he is running off to baseball or basketball or playing with the other 10 year old neighborhood kids or teasing his sister or playing a video game or doing his homework.

But I will bide my time and wait for the right moment when I can remind him in some 10 year old appropriate way that he is good and that he is learning and that he is only 10, and it is okay to make mistakes and it is okay to not know and it is okay to cry and it is okay, it’s all okay.

But I can’t say it to him quite yet.

But I can say it here, to the 10 year old in all of us, who perhaps has forgotten what we once knew.

I could say:

Don’t forget that you once knew you were good. Before the conditioning and the tired voices all around you told you otherwise.

Don’t forget that it is okay to make mistakes, and its okay not to know, and it is okay not to be sure, and it’s okay to cry and we are all like children until we reach enlightenment.

Don’t forget that you have greatness in you, too.

Don’t forget that you are perfection becoming more perfect.

Don’t forget. Don’t forget.

Remember who you truly are.

Remember that you are good and you are learning.

Remember that the earth is a school.

And that you came to grow and to learn and to share and serve and to enjoy.

Don’t be so hard on yourself.

Forgive yourself.

It’s all okay.

I love you.

Don’t forget. Don’t forget.

And maybe, just maybe, the 10 year old inside of all will, at long last, remember what has been forgotten.