Yearly Archives: 2022

Perfect is the Enemy of Good.

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It was evening time and Thanksgiving was winding down. My once very perfectionistic nine year old niece was lying on the carpet and I was rubbing her back. I looked at her and felt compelled to say: 
 
“Ariana, you are a good person. “
 
There was a pause and then she replied: “Really? “
 
And I said: “Yes, really. You are a very good person. “
 
She paused again and then said: “That is nice to hear.”
 
There was another pause and I could feel her wheels turning. I then added: 
 
“You are not a perfect person. No one is a perfect. But you are a good person.”
 
Again, there was a pause and she replied: 
“My mom always says no one is perfect.”
 
That’s right I replied:
“ No one is perfect. But you still can be good.”
 
And then the conversation drifted and turned and it was time to brush teeth and one more snack and please go to bed already, etc…etc..
 
The next day came and we found ourselves in the living room, various conversations happening at once and my 9 year old niece was writing an essay about our family (she is learning to write essays in school.). There was a paragraph for her mom, a paragraph for me and a paragraph for her grandmother (otherwise known as Bubby.). And then there was her conclusion. 
 
I thought I’d share here conclusion here:
 
“All in all, I have a great family and everyone is smart, kind and talented. They are good people. You can’t be perfect, but you can be good.”
 
I guess she was listening. I thought to myself as I read her essay.
 
They say that the only person we are ever talking to is ourself. So I guess this was one of my Thanksgiving messages as well: 
 
You can’t be perfect, but you can be good.
 
And lest you think I had the perfect Thanksgiving with interesting conversation and well written essays, it wasn’t perfect. There was even a moment where I dug a cake cover out of the trash to everyone’s horror and dismay.
 
Thanksgiving wasn’t perfect. But it was good.
 
Have a nice week everyone!

Sincerely,

Hayley Mermelstein
 
 

Welcoming what is.

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I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

Take a moment now and deeply welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I let go of my resistance to what is.
I let go of my resistance to what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

When I welcome what is I become calm.
My calm leads to clarity.

And so for today:

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I welcome it to the table as if I had personally invited it.
For today I deeply welcome what is.

I welcome what is and
I am aware of what shows up differently when I show up differently.

I welcome what is and
I am aware of what changes when I change.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

Embody it.
Feel it.

Become it.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

When I welcome what is, I become calm.
When I welcome what is, clarity is a natural biproduct.

I welcome what is without trying to change what is.
I welcome what is without trying to fix what is.

I welcome what is without trying to control what is.
I simply welcome what is.

This is my affirmation for today.
This is my embodiment for today.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I welcome what is and I am aware of what shows up differently when I show up differently.

I welcome what is and I am aware of what changes when I change.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I let go of my resistance to what is.
I let go of my resistance to what is.

I welcome what is without trying to change what is.
I welcome what is without trying to fix what is.

I welcome what is without trying to control what is.
I simply welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

Become the embodiment of:
I welcome what is.

As always see what shows up differently when you show up differently.
Be aware of what changes when you change.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I deeply welcome what is.
I deeply welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

~Hayley Mermelstein
From: The Power of Affirmations

I used to be arrogant.

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A psychic looked me in the eye not too long ago and said: You used to be arrogant and now you are humble. Do you understand?

There was a long pause and then I replied: Yes, yes I do. I understand completely.

And as I answered I reflected back on my life. I had a subtle arrogance in my younger years. Why is everyone so stupid? How could they do that? I wondered quietly to myself.

I wondered this until I too discovered the challenge of being human and made my own mistakes which took me years to recover from.

The process was painful and humbling. Life is still humbling. It is so tempting to become arrogant especially when things are going our way. But I have found that there is a danger in arrogance. Life seems to favor the humble. When I get arrogant I get the feeling that life feels a need to remind me that I don’t have ultimate control and that everything can change in an instant.

I was reminding myself of all this this morning. I was feeling good. Things have been working out for me lately. It was then I reminded myself: Stay humble. Stay humble. Be appreciative. Be thankful. Be careful not to slide into arrogance. Life is up and down, back and forth. Sometimes the stars are with you and sometimes life brings unexpected challenges. Stay humble. Your life works better when you are in humility.

And so today, I wrote an affirmation for myself about humility. To remind myself of how I want to go through my day. I thought I’d share it here in case you too are working on staying in humility as well.

I am filled with humility.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Feel it.
Embody it.

Be it.

Be humility.
Be the embodiment of humility.

Allow every cell of your body to be filled with humility.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

I am humble.
I am appreciative.

I am grateful.
I am kind.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

There is a danger to arrogance.
And so I embody humility,

Every day I practice humility.
Every day I remind myself to be humble.
Every day I embody humility.

I do not have ultimate control.
But for the grace of God go i.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Learn to be humble.
Not a false humility that hides a secret arrogance.

Learn to embody a true humility that understands that the earth is a school and we have come for growth, we have come for learning and that no one is exempt.

Be appreciative for what you have.
Be grateful.

But also be filled with humility.
Humility is your greatest protection.

When you are arrogant then one of your life lessons becomes to learn humility. This is not an easy lesson.

And so embody humility today.

Be humility.
Be compassion for the human condition.

Be appreciation.
Be love.

Do not judge.
Do not be arrogant.

But for the grace of God go I.
Everything can change in a moment.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Embody it.
Become it.

Be it.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Take a moment now and affirm:

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Be aware of what shows up differently when you show up differently.

So often we wait for the external world to change so that we can feel better.

For today embody humility and see what shows up differently when you show up differently.

Allow this to be your grand experiment with life.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility
I am filled with humility.

Again,

What shows up differently when you show up differently?
What changes when you change?

Really look.
Really notice.

Life is a school.
No one is exempt.

Be humble.
Be kind.

Be love.
And walk your path in humility.

Learn what you have come to learn and
you will be satisfied with your journey.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Humility is my strength and
Humility is my protection.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

~Hayley Mermelstein

Being Genuine.

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I was meditating this morning and a question arose in my mind. The question was what would help improve my relationships? (and help me feel less “pulled at”). The answer came back rather quickly. I heard the message in my mind: Be more genuine.

I was sitting with the answer and felt compelled to write another few pages in the book i am working on. (its a book of affirmations). I think at this point i am writing it mostly for myself, but felt inspired to share these 2 or 3 pages in case you also might be working on being more real and authentic as you are going through your every day life.

I am genuine.

I am genuine.
I am genuine.

Take a moment and affirm:

I am genuine.
I am real.

I am myself.
I am authentic.

I am me.

I am genuine.
I am genuine.

Feel it.
Embody it.

Become it.

What would it be like to be more genuine?
What would it be like to be more yourself?

What would you say?
What would you do?

Where would you speak up?
Where would you remain silent?

Where would you say yes and
Where would you say no?

What would you change?
What would you do differently?

Affirm:

I am genuine.
I am genuine.

I am myself.
I am authentic.

I am real
I am me.

I express my true self.
I express my deepest self.
I express my deepest truth.

I go deep within and find my highest expression.
I go deep within and express my deepest truth.

I allow this to be a process.
Take a moment now and embody:

I am genuine.
I am genuine.

Be aware of what shows up differently when you show up differently.
Be aware of what changes when you change.

How would your relationships change if you were more yourself?
What would show up differently if you showed up differently?

So often we wait for the external world to change so that we can feel better.

In this model we change our energy first and then be aware of what shows up differently when we show up differently.

For today affirm:

I am genuine.
I am genuine.

I am myself.
I am me.

I am real.
I am authentic.

I am genuine.
I am genuine.
I am genuine.

Be aware of what shows up differently when you show up differently.
Be aware of what changes when you change.

Be gentle with yourself for learning to express your deepest nature is a process.

In a world where we have been separated from our deepest self,
reclaiming the true self is an achievement.

Allow this to be a process.
Allow this to be two steps forward, one step back.

But practice every day:

I am genuine.
I am genuine.

I am myself.
I am real.

I am authentic.
I am me.

I am genuine.
I am genuine.
I am genuine.

Embody it.
Feel it.

Become it.

Practice being genuine today and be aware of what shows up differently when you show up differently.

I am genuine.
I am genuine.
I am genuine.

The Rose

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I love myself.
I forgive myself.

Love builds inner strength.
Much like watering a planet strengthens the plant.

Water yourself with much love.

There is no one to heal out there.
Just work on your own healing.

Learn to love yourself.
This is the greatest contribution you can make.

Everyone will benefit from your own healing.

Heal yourself.
Do not look to heal those around you.

Heal yourself.
Love yourself.

And
Take everyone with you.

As you evolve,
it helps everyone.

Be love.
Be compassion.

Be like the rose.

Allowing your perfume to fill the room,
Effortlessly.

~Hayley Mermelstein

Devotion

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I am filled with devotion.
I am filled with devotion.

I am devoted to listening deeply.
I am devoted to offering my full contribution.
I am devoted to service.
I am devoted to spirit.

I am devoted to listening to the whispers of spirit within me.
I am devoted to listening to the whispers of spirit all around me.

I am devoted to listening deeply to myself.
I am devoted to listening deeply to others.

At the deepest level there is consensus about what is best for the whole.

There are not my needs and your needs.
There is simply what best serves the oneness of which we are all a part.

When you are in a deep place in your and I am in a deep place in me there will be consensus about what is best for the whole.

Compromise is you get a little of what you need, I get a little of what I need.

Consensus is a deep listening to what most serves the oneness.
Consensus is a deep listening at the spirit level.

Again, if you are in a deep place in you and I am in a deep place in me there will be agreement about what is best for the whole.

This consensus can only be reached through deep listening, and through deep looking and is a skill that can be cultivated.

Begin today by filling yourself with a feeling of devotion.

Affirm frequently:

I am filled with devotion.
I am devoted to deep listening.
I am devoted to deep looking.
I am devoted to serving the oneness.
I am devoted to offering my full contribution.
I am filled with devotion.

I am filled with devotion.
I am devoted to listening deeply to myself.
I am devoted to listening deeply to others.
I am devoted to listening deeply to the whispers of spirit that are within me and all around me.
I am filled with devotion.

I am filled with devotion.
I am filled with devotion.
I am filled with devotion.

Listen deeply today and allow your devotion to guide you in right action.

Listen deeply today and consider what is best for the whole.

You are included in that whole.
Begin by listening deeply within and honoring the self.

Seek to serve the oneness in all that you think, say and do.

Affirm frequently:

I am filled with devotion.
I am filled with devotion.
I am filled with devotion.

See what shows up differently in your life when you show up differently.

It is said nothing changes until you change.

For today immerse yourself in the feeling of devotion and be aware of what shows up differently when you show up differently.

Approach your work from a feeling of devotion to serving the oneness.

Approach your relationships from a place of devotion. (Devotion to listening deeply to yourself and to others.)

Approach each part of your life with a feeling of devotion.

Allow this to be your grand experiment with life.

I am filled with devotion.
I am filled with devotion.
I am filled with devotion.

~Hayley Mermelstein

Humility and Compassion

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I was sitting in the orthopedics waiting room. I had just been told by a doctor that I needed surgery on my right wrist (my dominant hand) and had been sent to this office for a second opinion.

It had been an icy week in February and the orthopedic office has 150 appointments that day. The waiting room was packed with injured adults. I looked out into a sea of arm slings and leg casts and neck braces and crutches.

I sat in silence and only had two words echoing in my head:

Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.

I felt so humbled, as I have felt many times in my life. One minute you are straightening up and taking out the trash, getting ready to go to work. And then two hours later you are here, sitting in a waiting room, in this alternate reality.

I felt so flooded with waves and waves of humility that it almost felt worth the price of admission. Almost.

How have you let yourself become arrogant, again? I asked myself.
It requires so much humility to walk this earth. I reminded myself.

Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.

I went to a psychic healer one time. I was sitting in front of him and he looked me in the eyes and said you used to be arrogant but now you are humble. Do you understand?

Yes, yes I do.. I said to him.
And then there was a long pause as neither one of spoke.

Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.

And then there was the compassion. I sat in the waiting room, looking out into the sea of people with worried looks on their faces and I felt flooded with compassion for this human condition of which we are all a part. We were all in this together and no one is exempt. I reminded myself.

Waves and waves of compassion flooded my body. It was so profound that it was almost worth the price of admission. Almost.

And now I try to remind myself of these feelings every day.

Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.

After waiting for over 90 minutes for my appointment, I finally had my turn with the doctor.

You don’t need surgery he said.
And you will be fine, he said .
You will be back to work in no time.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.
Humility and compassion.

It turns out he was right.

May the force be with all of us and may we stay humble and compassionate. It’s not an easy journey for anyone but it is filled with growth and learning. The earth really is a school. And we are the humble students and sometimes the humble teacher too.

Have a good Sunday.

~Hayley Mermelstein

Acceptance

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I accept what is.
I accept what is.

Go deeper now into acceptance.
Deeper and deeper.

I accept what is.
I accept what is.

How deeply can you go?

Gently let go of your resistance to what is.
Let this be your grand experiment with life.

I accept what is.
I accept what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I allow what is.
I allow what is.

Going deeper and deeper into acceptance now.

I accept what is.
I accept what is.
I accept what is.

Take a moment now and go deeply into acceptance. How deeply can you go? As you accept what is, knowing about how to best be with what is will naturally arise. For now, focus on acceptance. How deeply can you accept?

When you are in acceptance you naturally surrender your resistance to what is. When you are not resisting what is there will be a natural knowing about how to best handle what is.

For now simply focus on acceptance. See how deeply you can accept. Sometimes you are learning to say yes, and sometimes you are learning to say no. Sometimes you are learning to walk away and sometimes you are learning to lean in and persevere, When you are in acceptance a natural knowing about how to be with what is will arise in its own time.

Acceptance stills the choppy waters within. As the waters settle, wisdom and knowing naturally arise.

For today, see how deeply you can simply be with what is. How deeply can you accept? How deeply can you welcome what is as if you personally invited it to the table? The universe is always talking to us. In deep acceptance you can hear the still small voice within that is always guiding us.

For today affirm:

I accept what is.
I accept what is.

I deeply accept what is.
I deeply accept what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I welcome what is as if I had personally invited it to the table.

I accept what is.
I accept what is.

I let go of my resistance.

I accept what is.
I accept what is.
I accept what is.

When the time is right, I will be guided in right action.
When the time is right, knowing will arise.

For today I accept what is.
For today I sit with what is.

For today I sit with my pain.
For today I welcome what is to the table.

I accept what is.
I accept what is.

I accept what is.
I accept what is.