Sugar and spice and everything nice

Be a good girl they said.
And so I was.

Always wanting to please and be pleasing.
Kind, nice, sweet and warm.

And while these things are true for me, still it left me with years and years of anxiety….All the repressed emotions. All the repressed feelings causing mayhem and unrest in this one body of mine.

And so now, I feel it all.
All emotinos are welcome here.

Sugar and spice and everything nice and anger and rage and grief and sadness and power and strength and peace. And peace. And peace.

All my emotions are welcome here.

And I welcome you too.

I saught to repress you just as I had been repressed, because I thought that was the right thing and now I say.

All of your emotions are welcome here.

Sugar and spice and everything nice and power and strength and sadness and grief and love and compassion and acceptance and hate.

All move through me now.
All are allowed.

I understand now, that what is allowed eventually moves toward peace.

I let it all flow through me now.

Nothing is repressed.
Nothing is suppressed.

All is allowed.
All is welcome here.

I welcome all of you.

I welcome your sugar and spice and I welcome your anger and resentment and power and strength and love and compassion.

I welcome your depth.
I welcome your range of emotions.

I welcome it all.

And in the depth is where the strength is.
And in the depth is where the power is.

And in the depth is where the genuine lives.

I welcome your genuine expression.
I welcome your moments of grandeur and I welcome your moments of humanness.

I welcome your strengths and I welcome your weaknesses.
I welcome your humility and I welcome your arrogance.

And I welcome my humility and I welcome my arrogance.

We are all learning and growing. Moment by moment, day by day, learning and growing. Rising to the top, sinking to the bottom.

Love, hate. Anguish, despair. Elevated emotions and human conflict. All are welcome here. All are welcome here.

Shame, pride, high, low. Sugar and spice and everything nice and power and strength and confidence and love and compassion and grief and even hate.

Let it all pass through you.
Let it all move through you.

You do not need to act on any of it, but you do need to feel it.

No emotion is banished here.

Step up and be yourself.
Step up and be real.
Step up and be genuine.

Allow your true self to come forward.

When you are feeling taken advantage of, feel it. Don’t repress it because you think life is easier if you don’t feel it.

When you feel resentment, feel it. Allow it. Let it speak to you. Resentment is the barameter telling you something needs to change (either your attitude or circumstance.)

Feel it all.
Allow it all to move through you.

No emotion is banished here.

Everything is welcomed and allowed.

Sugar and spice and everything nice. And power and strength and confidence and joy and grief and sadness and love and frustration.

Let the various weather patterns move through you.

I am a volcano and I am a warm breeze and I am a sunny day and I am a passing storm and I am love and I am kindness and I am sugar and spice and I am warm and I am powerful and I am love and I am strength and I am a warrior and I am afraid and I am ashamed sometimes and I am confident and I am talented and I am gifted and I am weak and I missed the class where they taught you how to do stuff. And I don’t know how to change a tire. And I am strong and I am weak. And I am real. And I am genuine. And I am myself. And I am free. I am free. I am free. I am free to be me in all my glory and all my weakness and all my light and all my love and all my fear and all my anxiety. This human condition thing is hard sometimes. And I am myself.

Sugar and spice and everything nice.

And love and compassion and power and strength and sad and grief and fear and hate and all is welcome here. All is welcome here. All is welcome here.

In this imperfect world, on this imperfect planet hurling through space with no end in sight.

Sugar and spice and everthing nice.

Real.
Genuine.
Authentic.
Power.

All is welcome here.

To be oneself is the greatest accomplishment of all.

Sugar and spice and everything nice.

Be real.
Be you.
Be genuine.
Be kind.
Be sad.
Be strong.
Be weak.

Be you.
Be you.

Be genuinely you.

All emotions are welcome here.
At long last. All emotions are welcome.

I am at peace.
I am at peace.
I am at peace.

What is allowed leads to peace.
What is allowed leads to peace.

Allow it all.
Allow it all.

And be at peace.

Sugar and spice and everything nice…

Be at peace.
Be at peace.
Be at peace.

Welcome it all.
Welcome it all.

Welcome the ignorance and the brilliance.
Welcome the love and the hate.
Welcome the humility and the greatness.
Welcome the silence and the expression.
Welcome the passive and the aggressive.

Welcome it all.

The welcoming will lead to peace and the peace will lead to clarity and the clarity will lead to right action.

But first welcome it.

Welcome it all.
Welcome it all.

The great secret to life.
Welcome it all.

Let this be your experiment today.
Speaking words of wisdom: Let it be. Let it be.

There will be an answer let it be.

Welcome it all.
Welcome it all.
Welcome it all.

At long last.
Welcome it all.

All emotions are welcome here.

Feelings are for feeling and so for today I allow myself to feel.
All feelings are welcome here.

I welcome all my feelings.
I welcome all my emotions.

Everything moves through me now.
Nothing is resisted.

I’m tired of the fight.

Elevate.
Rise up.

Love.
Laugh.

But first feel.
Feel it all.

Grief.
Fear.
Anger.

Let it all move through you.

Resist nothing.
What you resist persists.

And so experiment today with allowing it all to move through you.
Feel it all.

Let it all be okay.

Each feeling has something to teach you.
Welcome them all with an open heart.

All feelings are welcome here.
All emotions are welcome.

Nothing is repressed.
All is allowed.

Let it all move through you.

Nothing blocked.
Nothing suppressed.

Allow.
Flow.

Surrender to the waves moving through you.

Welcome.
Welcome.

Welcome it all.

I welcome you.

I welcome all my feelings.
I welcome all of my emotions.

Nothing is repressed.
Nothing is suppressed.

Everything moves through me.

Every feeling is honored.
Every feeling is welcomed.

It all moves.
It all flows.

And as I allow these feelings to move through me they transform and speak to me.

Each feeling has a message.

Nothing is banished here.
Nothing is banished here.

And so allow your feelings today.
Allow them to speak to you.

Welcome everything.
Welcome it all.

Let this be your experiment with life today.
What happens when all is welcomed and nothing is banished.

What are your feelings wanting to communicate to you?
What have you banished and what do you allow?

For today welcome the storms.

Welcome the grief.
Welcome the anger.

Welcome the love.
Welcome the joy.

Let all weather patterns move through you and observe, listen, feel.

I welcome it all.
Nothing is banished here.

I welcome you.
I welcome you.
I welcome you.

I allow.
I allow.
I allow.

Everything moves through me.

Nothing is blocked.
Nothing is banished.

All is observed.
Felt.
Experienced.

Allow.
Allow.
Allow.

Welcome.
Welcome.
Welcome.

Observe.

Feel.
Experience.

What is resisted, persists.

So flow.
So experience.

Welcome it all.
Welcome it all.

What unfolds when all emotions are allowed and welcomed?
What unfolds when nothing is banished.

Let yourself and others have their process.
Let this be your experiment with life today.

I welcome all my feelings.
I welcome all my emotions.

Nothing is banished here.
All is welcomed.

Nothing is repressed or suppressed.

All is allowed.

I welcome all my feelings.
I welcome all my feelings.
I welcome all my feelings.

Everything moves through me.

Storms come and go.
Weather patterns pass.

The sun shines again.

All is allowed.
All is welcomed.

I love you as you are.

I welcome you.
I welcome you.
I welcome you.

Be at peace and welcome all parts of you to the table.

I welcome you.
I welcome you.
I welcome you.

After years of repression.

I welcome you.
I welcome you.
I welcome you.

Cultivating Trust

I stumbled upon this affirmation I wrote a few years back. Thought it would be helpful to share during these interesting times.

I trust.

I trust.
I trust.

I let go and I trust the process of life.
I trust that spirit is working with me to manifest what I need.

I trust that spirit is my helper.
I trust that spirit is my partner.

I trust.
I trust.

I trust that powerful guides are by my side.
I trust that I am being guided.
I trust that I live a guided life.

I trust.
I trust.

I trust that there is a spiritual force of life that is always working with me.

I trust.
I trust.

I trust the power of spirit and focus on that power rather than focusing on the size of my problems.

I trust the power of spirit and make that power bigger than my enemies.

I trust.
I trust.

I devote myself to service and I draw in even more powerful assistance.

I devote myself to service and I am surrounded by powerful beings of light.

I let go and I trust the process of life.
I let go and I trust the process of life.

I trust.
I trust.

Take a moment now and immerse yourself in trust. Give yourself permission to remember that powerful beings of light are all around you working with you to manifest what you need. Remember that you are never alone.

When you are tempted to become overwhelmed with your problems, turn instead and focus on the power of spirit.

Focus on the power of spirit within you and the power of spirit all around you. Ask for divine assistance. Focus on the power of spirit and allow the power of spirit to bring you through.

Be sure to couple your trust in spirit with wise decision making and appropriate action.

Be aware of how this impacts the quality of your day.

Welcoming what is.

Welcome what is.
Welcome what is.

Let go of your resistance to what is.
Let go of the fight.

Surrender to the moment.
Surrender to what is.

Welcome it.
Be curious about it.
Explore it.

What has it come to teach you?

Welcome what is.
Welcome what is.

But i don’t want to welcome what is, a voice from deep inside cries out.

I want to run.
I want to hide.
I am in pain.

And still a deeper, stronger voice insists:

Welcome what is.
Welcome what is.

Be curious.
Explore it.

You have been given tools to work with this.

Embrace it now.

Act as if it is good, and important, and will take you somewhere positive.

Welcome what is.
Welcome what is.

Relax.
Surrender.
Allow.

Don’t be so quick to push this experience away.

Surrender now and welcome what is.

Love yourself through it.

This situation (among other things) is deepening your compassion for the human condition.

Surrender.
Relax.
Allow.

Welcome what is.

Go for a walk now.
And walk in the energy of welcoming what is.

Go deep into the concept.
How deeply can you welcome what is?

Let this be your experiment with life today.
Welcome what is and see what transpires.

When you let go of your resistance, when you let go of the fight, clarity will be a natural bi product.  When you let go of the resistance you can ask:  Given what is, what am i to do?

But for now simply welcome what is as if you have personally invited it in.  Welcome what is and be at peace.

~Hayley Mermelstein

If you listen deeply enough….

I once heard it said: That is you listen deeply enough the people around you will unravel into their own answers. This simple sentence has been echoing in my mind for over ten years now. It’s been a slow re- learning for me and sometimes I forget. A lot of times I forget.

But lately, I’ve been remembering more and more.

If you listen deeply enough the people around you will unravel into their own answers.

To listen in this way we must be patient, because this can take some time. To listen in this way we must be humble, for it is no longer about us being the wise advisor saving our wounded and injured clients, friends and family members.

To listen in this way we become the humble servant creating space for the wise one in front of us to unfold into the wisdom that lies within them.

Seek to get out of the way when you listen. Seek to create a deep space for others to unfold. Seek to listen as deeply as you can so that others can unravel into their own answers. Do not seek to be the healer. Do not seek to be the wise one. Do not worry about what you need to say or do. Seek instead to listen as deeply as you can. Seek to remember that the one you are listening to has tremendous wisdom in them and if you listen deeply enough they will unravel into their own knowing.

Pull up a chair and seek to listen as deeply as you can. Watch in wonder as the person in front of you slowly unfolds into their own knowing.

When you listen in this way you will know when it is your turn to speak and when it is your turn to listen. But more often than not you will remain silent more of the time. More often than not your main job will be to hold space for someone to access their own wisdom and inner knowing.

Let this be your experiment with life.

See how deeply you can listen as you go through your day today. How deeply can you listen to yourself? How deeply can you listen to others? How deeply can you listen to the whispers of spirit that are all around you?

Resist the urge to jump in prematurely with your words of wisdom or advice giving. Trust that you will know if and when it is your time to speak.

Seek instead to see how deeply you can listen. Remember that the person before you has a depth of wisdom in them and that when given the right kind of time and attention can unfold into this wisdom.

Again let this be your experiment with life.

Listen deeply to yourself.
Listen deeply to others.
Listen deeply to whispers of spirit all around you.

And above all else, listen in such a way that you allow others to unravel into their own answers.

Do not just take my word for it either. Let this truly be your experiment with life. It truly is amazing what happens when you listen deeply.

And so listen deeply today and allow yourself and others to unravel into their own answers. Listen deeply and see what unfolds. Listen deeply and observe what wisdom arises from your own being and observe what wisdom arises from others.

This will take time and patience.

One of the reasons you do not listen deeply is because you are in a rush. Give others the gift of your time and patience.

(When it is yours to give.)

In listening deeply you will know what conversations are yours to have and which are not the ones that are right for you.

In listening deeply you will know when it is time to talk and when it is time to listen.

In listening deeply you will know when it is time to start a conversation and when it is time to end a conversation.

In listening deeply you will know what will best serve the oneness.

So devote today to listening deeply:

Listen deeply to yourself.
Listen deeply to others.
Listen deeply to the whispers of spirit all around you.

See what wisdom unravels in yourself and others when you listen in this way.

Allow this to be your experiment with life today.

~Hayley Mermelstein

The Heart is Meant to Radiate Like the Sun

The heart is meant to shine like the sun. Allow your heart to shine now. Allow your heart to shine brightly. See your heart like a radiant sun.

Start with self love.

Affirm:

I love myself.
I love myself.
I love myself.

Even if you are not sure if you believe it yet, just allow yourself to repeat this simple affirmation again and again.

I love myself.
I love myself.
I love myself.

How many times a day can you say this to yourself?

What might heal in your body, in your mind, and in your life if you kept repeating this to yourself?

Let this be your experiment with life.

Do not underestimate its tremendous power of love to heal both yourself and others.

The Heart is meant to shine.
Allow your heart to shine brightly now.

See a radiant sun in the center of your chest. Allow it to grow brighter and brighter now.

Affirm:

I am love and love is all around me.
I am love and love is all around me.
I am love and love is all around me.

Allow the heart to love.
Allow the heart to shine.

Allow the heart to be bright now.

Generate love.
Allow love to flow through you.

Alllow everyone to be a receipent of your love.

Everyone is flawed.
Everyone is learning.
Everyone is making mistakes.

Love them anyway.

The heart is meant to shine like the sun.
So allow your heart to shine.

Take your own inventory but allow others to be as they are.

Flawed.
Wounded.
Entitled.
Self absorbed.

Your test is to keep your heart open in the face of these wounds.

We can speak of love and light but your challenge is to love the wounded places both within yourself and others.

Allow your heart to be like the sun
Offer your light and your love to everyone.

Allow your heart to love while simultaneously staying discerning about your right relationship with those you interact.

Love all but practice wisdom.
Be wise about who you allow into your life.

Love all but stay aware of the limitations of those with whom you interact.

Love all but be discerning about who you invite for dinner.

Love all, including yourself.

Let this be your grand experiment with life.
What shows up differently when you show up differently.

I love myself; therefore….

I love myself and therefore, I am open to receive.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to healing.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to the light.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to love.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to abundance.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to adventure.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to new experiences.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to new opportunities.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to newness.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to the powerful beings of light that are all around me.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to divine guidance.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to miracles.

I love myself and therefore, I know that I deserve goodness.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to all that life wants to bring to me.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to the very best that life has to offer.

I love myself and therefore, I am open to the very best that life has to offer.

I love myself and therefore I trust the process of life.

I love myself and therefore I trust life is working with me to manifest what I need.

I love myself and therefore I expect the best possible outcome.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to be spontaneous.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to step into my greatness.

I love myself and therefore I make wise decisions.

I love myself and therefore I know and honor my needs.

I love myself and therefore I know my clear priorities.

I love myself and therefore I believe in myself.

I love myself and therefore I value myself.

I love myself and therefore I have confidence in myself.

I love myself and therefore I have confidence that life is working with me to manifest what I need.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to step into my power.

I love myself and therefore, I don’t hold back.

I love myself and therefore I am fully expressive.

I love myself and therefore I express my needs.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to be genuine.

I love myself and therefore I am myself.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to be imperfect.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to be a student of life.

I love myself and therefore I know that mistakes are necessary for learning and growth.

I love myself and therefore I can accept both compliments and crititcism, for I understand that I learn from both.

I love myself and therefore I know that I am good and that I am learning.

I love myself and therefore I offer myself kindness and care.

I love myself and therefore I forgive myself.

I love myself and therefore I forgive others.

I love myself and therefore I offer compassion to myself.

I love myself and therefore I offer compassion to others.

I love myself and therefore I allow love into my life.

I love myself and therefore I am discerning about who I allow into my life.

I love myself and therefore I am open to love.

I love myself and therefore I am courageous.

I love myself and therefore I am both cautious and courageous.

I love myself and therefore I offer myself radical self acceptance.

I love myself and therefore no feeling of mine is banished.

I love myself and therefore I accept all parts of myself.

I love myself and therefore I honor my strengths.

I love myself and therefore I embrace my weaknesses.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to experience peace.

I love myself and therefore I surrender control.

I love myself and therefore I can say yes.

I love myself and therefore I can say no.

I love myself and therefore I can act.

I love myself and therefore I can wait.

I love myself and therefore I can speak and I can listen.

I love myself and therefore I need no validation.

I love myself and therefore I know who I am.

I love myself and therefore I allow my creativity to flow.

I love myself and therefore I give myself permission to just be.

I love myself and therefore I give myself permission to strive for more.

I love myself and therefore I allow things to unfold in their own time.

I love myself and therefore I step into my humility.

I love myself and therefore I allow myself to be enough as I am.

I love myself and therefore I attend to my mind, body and spirit everyday.

I love myself and therefore I am disciplimed.

I love myself completely.

I love myself completely.

I love myself completely.

Be aware of what shows up differently in your life, when you show up differently.

Be aware of what changes when you change.

Be aware of what changes when you truly and deeply learn to love yourself.

I will be doing this grand experiment with life right along with you.

What about me?

It was late one evening (during non social distancing times) and we were having a big family sleep over at my parents home. Which basically meant that there were six adults and four kids under the age of 12 sleeping pretty much everywhere.

I traditionally have had the job of tucking the kids in.

In addition to helping them get ready for bed, I had gotten into the habit of giving each of the kids a short back massage to help them unwind. They enjoyed it and it was good bonding time for us.

Well, the 11 year old niece, who was actually only nine at the time, had made a couple of comments about how my back rubs were weird and felt funny and so I took that to mean that she didn’t particularly enjoy them.

I had no problem with this. One less kid to give a back rub to, I thought to myself.

It would actually make the night time routine a little less labor intensive!

So anyway, it’s night time and I get all of the kids tucked in. I give a back rub to the older kids and then kiss the 9 year old niece good night, shut off the light and head downstairs.

Suddenly, in the dark I hear a little indignant voice say: Hey, what about me?

It’s my niece and I can tell she is feeling slighted.

I answer back, I thought you didn’t like my back rubs. She answers back, I didn’t say that. I want to be included too.

Oh, I’m sorry I say. I misunderstood.

And, I head back up the stairs to give one more child a little extra attention and some TLC.

But while I’m walking up the stairs I am thinking how my niece is my teacher.

If the tables were turned, and I was nine and she was the adult, I don’t think I would have spoken up. I think I would have laid in bed feeling rejected, feeling left out, and feeling hurt.

I so admired that little voice in the night that spoke up and didn’t just sit with her pain. I admired that she could ask for what she needed. I admired that she could say, Hey, what about me?

And so I laid down next to my niece and rubbed her back for a while. She seemed very content and relaxed and then she asked very sweetly: Can you rub my head for a little while, that is actually my favorite part.

I nodded and I granted her request.

And with that, the nine year old smiled and drifted peacefully off to sleep.

And in the quiet of the night, I smiled too. You got a love a girl who can ask for what she needs.

Sweet dreams everyone.

~Hayley Mermelstein

Learning to be a warrior

This summer, during sunnier days, my 11 year old niece (who realizes I’m a little different from the rest of the family) asked if I could do a past life regression on her. I said yes, not realizing what was about to transpire.

I had her relax and imagine gold light filling her body. I had her close her eyes and walk down a flight of stairs into a past life.

She walked down the flight of stairs in her minds eye and boom, she was off and running. She started describing her family life from a different time and different place. There were huts and fires and family and a boat. The boat keep coming up.

I continued to walk her through the regression when suddenly she was on the boat and cannons were being shot at the boat that she was on and she was afraid. She said she thought she was at war and cannons were being shot at the boat.

Suddenly, i become afraid.

Shit, I thought to myself, what have I done. I’ve regressed my eleven year old niece into a past life where cannons are being shot at her.

A fear of accidentally traumatizing my beloved niece overcame me.

It’s to late now, i thought to myself. I need to see this through.

So, back to my niece.

She is half hypnotized describing the scene where cannons are being shot at her boat and suddenly everything goes black and she says: i’m not seeing anything anymore. I just feel quiet and peaceful.

There is a long pause.

I ask her if she has died.

She pauses back, and says yes, she has died.

I sit for a moment and then I ask her to stay in this meditative state and ask what was she learning in that life time. I asked her to listen quietly and allow an answer to come to her.

About ten seconds pass. She pauses and says:

I was learning to be a warrior.
I was learning to be strong.

I allow another moment to pass and allow her space to take in the message.

I slowly guide her back.

She opens her eyes, looks right at me and says: That was really cool.

She then promptly runs off to play with the other kids in the water.

I breathe a sigh of relief. She is okay.

By God: She is a warrior.

Can you hear the words beneath the words?

Once I was listening deeply to a friend who was talking about leaving her husband. I was practicing deep listening at the time and was giving all of my attention to this. (i.e. I wasn’t thinking about what I needed to say in response or multitasking or advice giving. I was just listening.)

As my friend talked about leaving her husband I heard a deeper part of her tell me that she would never leave him because of their money situation. I heard the words beneath the words. When I listened in this way, I had access to much more information than I normally would have. It wasn’t subtle. Actually, it felt like a super power. When I focused on really listening, I was amazed at the information that I had access to.

Practice deep listening today. See how deeply you can listen.

What do you hear when you listen in this way? Can you hear the words beneath the words?

Let this be your experiment with life today. Listen to the words beneath the words. YOu may be amazed at what you discover.