A particular lecture in college always stands out for me. I don’t remember what class it was or who was the teacher but we were talking about the bible. The presenter said: We all know that in the bible it says that every seventh day is a day of rest but what most people don’t know is that the passage continues after that. According to my teacher the bible went on to say: Every seventh week should be a week of rest. Every seventh month a month of rest and every seventh year a year of rest. Thus the “sabbatical”.

This always stayed with me. In a culture that values productivity and wears busyness like a badge of honor many of us were not taught to value rest and time to recharge.

Recently in my practice I saw a new client. A women with two young kids who works full time. She was attractive but had dark circles under her eyes. I could see she was chronically tired and depleted. As I was beginning her healing session she asked me what do most people come in for?

I paused and thought about this. Was it pain? Sleep issues? Hormonal balance? Stress? Immune boosting? General balancing and wellness? Of course, people come in for all these reasons but as I reflected deeper the answer that came out of my mouth at that moment anyway was: Most people that come in to see me need permission to rest. I went on to say: I often pretend I have a magic wand and then say to my clients: I grant you permission to rest. Usually there is a palpable feeling of relief in the room.

So many of us in our culture have been taught to be productive, be busy, be on the go. Which is valuable. But most of us missed the class on rest, the importance of rest, the need for rest.

In Chinese medicine it is all about the yin and the yang. We need to balance our activity with rest and rejuvenation. We need to balance our productivity with time to putter and just be. We need to balance our striving with allowing life to unfold in its own time.

And so, I don’t know who needs to hear this today but if I had a magic wand (and maybe I do!), I would hold it over you and say: I give you permission to rest. I give you permission to rest for as long as you need. I give you permission to rejuvenate. I give you permission to breath. I give you permission to be creative. I give your permission to take space and putter. I give you permission to simply be with no agenda.

Take time in your life to rest and to rejuvenate. Value rest. Value space. Value beingness. Value quiet. Value meditation. You may be surprised how much healing happens naturally when you listen to your body and give it the space it needs to heal.

For whatever power is vested in me: I give you permission to rest.

I was sitting in an auditorium waiting for my turn to receive my healing when suddenly I heard a voice in my head. The male voice said: “ You are overidentified with your sensitivity. Identify with your power instead.”

The words echoed in my mind and I saw it to be true. I was the sensitive. I was the empath. I feel everything. But what if instead of thinking of myself in these terms I remembered that I am powerful. What if I remembered that I have great power in me. That the god force is alive in me. What if I learned to identify with my power instead?

Fast forward twenty years.

I was giving an acupuncture session to a new client. She is telling me about all of her sensitivities. I am listening without judgement. She lays down on the table and talks about how she wants to be a healer but feels too sensitive. She asks me how do I do the work I do and keep from absorbing my client’s problems?

I stop and consider this. I’m not sure of how to answer her. I pause. I reflect. And then the memory of the event twenty years earlier when I heard the message: You over identify with your sensitivity. Learn to identify with your power instead.

I relay this story to my client and she gets the chills. I so needed to hear that today she says. I think that is the whole reason I came to see you today. For that one message. All I do is think about how sensitive I am. I think about it all day long.

Yes. I say. I used to do the same.

What would it be like to remember that you are more powerful than you know, that great power resides in you?

What if you saw yourself as powerful, as strong?
What if the divine lives in you?

What if you are spirit?
What if you are the God force in drag?

How might this awareness affect how you go through your day?

I wrote down some notes for my client and It went something like this:

Power:

You are over identified with your sensitivity.
Learn to identify with your power instead.

Affirm frequently:

I am powerful.
I am filled with the power of spirit.

The divine lives in me.
I am the God force.

I am powerful.
I am powerful.

I am filled with the power of spirit.
I am filled with the power of spirit.

Feel your power.
Embody your power.

What if you are far more powerful than you know?
What if you are infinite power?

Begin today to focus on the power with in you.
Activate the observer effect.

What you focus on you get more of.

Identify with your power.
You are more powerful than you can imagine.

Use your power in service to others.
Use your power to offer your contribution.

Affirm frequently:

I am powerful.
I am powerful.
I am powerful.

Do not over identify with your sensitive.

But instead:

Know that the God force lives in you and you are far more powerful than you realize.

Learn to identify with your power.
Step into that power now.

You are more powerful than you know.
Step into that power now.

I am powerful.
I am powerful.

The God force lives in me.

I am powerful.
I am powerful.
I am powerful.

~Hayley Mermelstein

I was in a somewhat meditative state, working with a client when suddenly an energy filled the room I paused for a moment and then heard the words inside of me: The universe loves you. The energy of love began to fill the room. And then the words: All is forgiven. All is forgiven.

And for a moment I stopped and took in the new vibration and words: The universe loves me. All is forgiven. The universe loves me and all is forgiven.

My body relaxed. What would it be like to let myself off the hook for everything? To forgive myself for my mistakes and allow myself to feel the love of the universe?

I’ve been working with this experience this week and thought I’d share it here in case reminding you that the universe loves you and you are forgiven might help you as well.

What might heal in your body if you let yourself off the hook?
What might heal in your life if you let yourself off the hook?

I wrote as affirmation to help me absorb the energy that was coming through this week and thought I’d share it, in case it might help you as well.

The universe loves me. I am forgiven.

The universe loves me.
The universe loves me.

I am loved.
I am loved.

All is forgiven.
All is forgiven.

Feel it.
Embody it.

Act as it.
Feel it as if It is here now.

What would it be like to allow yourself to be forgiven?
What would it be like to allow yourself to take in the love of the universe?

The universe loves you.
The universe loves you.

Feel it.
Receive it.

All is forgiven.
All is forgiven.

You are forgiven for not knowing what you didn’t know.
You are forgiven for not being perfect.

It is okay.
It is okay.

The earth is a school.
You have come for growth and learning.

This is why you are here.

Allow yourself to receive this:
Allow yourself to take it in.

The universe loves you.
The universe loves you.

You are forgiven.
You are forgiven.

Allow yourself to heal.
Allow yourself to receive.

Allow yourself to be at peace.
Allow yourself to be restored.

The universe loves you.
The universe loves you.

You are forgiven.
You are forgiven.

All is well.
All is well.

Out of this situation only good will come.
Out of this situation only good will come.

The universe loves you.
The universe loves you.

You are forgiven.
You are forgiven.
You are forgiven.

Allow the love of the universe to fill you.
Allow forgiveness to fill every cell of your body.

Know that you are loved.
Know that you are forgiven.

Be at peace.
Be at peace.

All is well.
All is well.
All is well.

What if all of life is a mirror? What if life is mirroring back some part of our own consciousness? For example I have an unappreciative friend. The more I do for her the less she seems to appreciate it. It occurred to me the other day that perhaps she is mirroring a part of me that doesn’t appreciate myself.

I can talk to my friend. I can ask her to be more appreciative. (And maybe I will.) But perhaps I’m trying to change the mirror. If she is reflecting back some part of myself perhaps it would be equally (if not more) helpful for me to address the issue in myself.

How could I appreciate myself more?
Do I appreciate myself or am I self critical?
How could I honor and value myself more?

I’ve been reflecting on all this recently. I do in fact see my friend as a reminder from life for me to love and appreciate myself. The more she models this lack of appreciation, the more of a reminder it is for me to focus on loving and appreciating myself.

In the case of my friend: I have compassion (she is going through hell right now.) And in self respect I’ve taken a few steps back from the connection. But perhaps most importantly I’ve started a self love and self appreciation practice.

What is instead of trying to get the people around us to love, value and appreciate us we gave it to ourselves? What if the more we loved and appreciated ourselves in a genuine way, the more that love and appreciation began to be mirrored back to us? What if all of life is a mirror showing us where we need to heal? What if all of life is mirroring some aspect of our own inner consciousness? What if the only person we are ever talking to is ourselves? What if the only person we are here to fix is us?

And so for today I won’t beg for my friend to see me or appreciate me or value me. (Though I may bring it up if it feels appropriate.). For today I will practice loving myself. For today I will value myself. And for today I will deeply, deeply appreciate myself.

So often we are trying to change the world out there. So often we want others to see us, appreciate us, and value us. And while this is important, what if they are just mirroring back some aspect of our own inner world. What if the real healing is for us to love ourselves? What if the real healing is for us to appreciate and value ourselves? What if the real healing is for us to give ourself that kindness and care?

For today perhaps we can practice loving and appreciating ourselves and then see what shows up differently when we show up differently? For today perhaps we can take the time to really notice what changes when we change.

From this place of self love we may choose to address the issues that present in our lives for this can be an act of self care. But perhaps more importantly we will see the external world as a mirror showing us what we need to change inside of ourselves.

As we love and value ourselves perhaps either the people around us will love and value us more or perhaps some will fall away and new people will arrive. Or perhaps the more we love and value ourselves the less me are affected by those around us and we can give them space to learn and grow.

I’m still exploring this concept. And so for today I will focus on loving myself, valuing myself and appreciating myself rather than demanding this from the external world.

Maybe all of life is a mirror. And maybe, just maybe instead of trying to change the world out there the only person I need to change and heal is me.

A beautiful German woman sat next to me at the workshop and I instantly felt drawn to her and I instantly disliked her all at the same time. A Middle Eastern song came on while we waited for the speaker to come on stage and many stood up to move their bodies and to dance. The German woman turned towards me and we began to dance together. We danced a middle eastern dance that seemed to just arise between us. Our bodies fell together as if we had done this dance hundreds of times before.

Suddenly everything started to flicker and my consciousness moved to another place and another time. I was suddenly in a past life. I was transported to a life in a harem. The German woman and I were friends and the German woman and I were enemies. You see we were both in love with the same man. The man in the harem. Some women were just there for the kinship and community but she and I were also very much in love with the man. She and I were friends and we were competitors. Each hoping to be the chosen one.

And in this altered state I could feel her pain and I could feel mine. There was a deep longing in each of us. An almost unbearable lightness of being. She dealt with her pain by becoming more and more beautiful. (If I’m beautiful enough maybe I will be chosen.). I dealt with my pain by becoming more and more independent. (Who needs the man anyway.). But way underneath the surface was the secret longing. The longing for love. The longing for connection. Perhaps a longing that could never be satisfied in this human realm. The pain was there for both of us and I could see beneath the veneer of beauty and independence.

The song subsided and the dance ended and I found myself back in this place and this time, staring into the eyes of the beautiful German woman. Her eyes were piercing and intense. Her eyes were filled with love and hate and depth and intensity. Had she seen the past? Did she remember too?

The song ended and we all sat down. The speaker was onstage now. I looked up and saw him with new eyes. I recognized his instantly.

He was the man from the harem.

Someone asked me recently if I believed in past lives. I do I replied. How could you she asked. I have memories I said. They happen on a regular basis.

I’m still processing what I saw that day. I have repeated the pattern in this life. Dealing with the pain of lose and love and disappointment by becoming hyper independent. But I know the truth now.

I have no easy answers. No quick fixes.

Just awareness. Just allowing the unfolding to continue.

I welcome the pain that lies beneath the surface now. I welcome it deeply and do my best to allow it to be there after lifetimes of hiding from it.

The unbearable lightness of being.

What pain do you hold? Could you welcome it up? Could you sit with it? Could you allow It to reveal itself?

What we resist persists and
Anything deeply welcomed eventually leads to peace.

And so for today I welcome this pain that resides at the depth of my being. I welcome it to accompany me. I welcome it to the surface and allow it to have its way for me.

Today I have no answers,
Just a gentle welcoming of what is arising.

A sitting with the pain.
A sitting with the attempt to mask the pain.

For today I welcome.

I welcome.
I welcome.

I welcome what is.
And:

I welcome the resistance to what is.
I welcome my resistance.

I welcome the sadness.
I welcome the grief.
I welcome the regret.

I welcome it all.
I welcome it all.

I welcome the confusion.
I welcome the disappointment of what could have been.

I welcome not knowing what I didn’t know.

The earth is a school.
I welcome the learning process.

I welcome not wanting to be here some days.
I welcome that I am the wounded healer.

I welcome my wisdom and
I welcome my ignorance.

I welcome the pain of existence.
I welcome it all as best I can.

I welcome because resisting has become to hard.
I welcome because denying had become too unbearable.

I welcome all my experiences here.

The earth is a school whether I like it or not.
The earth is where we come to learn and grow.

I welcome my pain.
I welcome the longing for love.

I welcome my wholeness too.
I welcome my wholeness that lies beneath the pain.

I welcome my wholeness.
I welcome my wholeness.

I welcome the veneer of independence.
I welcome the German woman’s pain.

I see the pain of the man in the harem too.
He is confident and strong but beneath the surface there is pain in him too.

He has loved and lost.
He is afraid to be hurt again and so he spreads himself thin.

I welcome his pain too.

I was told one time that I am here to be a messenger of compassion.
It has been hard earned.

I offer you compassion for your pain as best I can.
A plate of compassion all around for this journey we are all on together.

A plate of compassion all around.
A plate of compassion all around.

Perhaps we can be softer with each other.

Who knows what lies beneath the surface?
Who knows what pain exists from this life time of other lifetimes?

If we knew each others story,
Compassion would be a natural biproduct.

And so,

I am learning to welcome.
I feel more like a student these days then a teacher.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

At the deepest level we are one.
At the deepest level we are whole, healed, complete.

A plate of compassion all around.
A plate of compassion all around.

To everyone.

You never know what someone else has endured.
You never know the story beneath the surface.

The hardest challenge.
The greatest lesson.

A plate of compassion all around.
A plate of compassion all around.
A plate of compassion all around.

~Hayley Mermelstein

Be love and see who comes.
Embody love now.

Your grand experiment with life.
Change your energy, change your life.

What happens when you change?
What shows up differently when you show up differently?

Be love and see who comes.
Be love and see who comes.

Stop trying to change those around you.
Stop making them your project.

No matter how tempting it is to think the problem is outside of you,
It is not.

Change yourself.
Change your own energy.

Be love and see who comes.
Be love and see what changes.

Some may move further away.
Some may come closer.

Be love.
Be the embodiment of love.

True love can say yes and true love can say no.
True love seeks to serve at the deepest level.

True love can be genuine.

True love does not seek to please the personality.
True love seeks to please the spirit.

Be the embodiment of love.
Be love today.

Be love and see who comes.
Be love and see who comes.

~Hayley Mermelstein

I welcome my human limitations.
I welcome that i am learning and growing.

I welcome that everyone is learning and growing.

I welcome.
I embrace.
I allow.

I welcome my human limitations.
I welcome my imperfections.

We are all imperfect and learning.
I welcome.

I welcome.
I welcome.

i embrace.
I allow.

I also welcome that there is a part of me that in unlimited.
I welcome my unlimited nature.

I welcome the place within in me that is whole, complete, never wounded, and one with all of life.

I welcome my wholeness.
I welcome my beingness.

I welcome my unlimited nature.
I welcome the unlimited.

There is a place within me of unlimiited abundance, unlimited wisdom, unlimited power, unlimited acceptance, unlimited love, unlimited wholeness, unlimited beingness, unlimited humility.

I welcome.
I welcome.

I welcome.
I welcome all parts of me.

I welcome my human imperfections and I welcome my true unlimited nature.

Both are true.
I welcome it all.

As I welcome my true unlimited nature, what I am capable of expands.

I welcome:

Unlimited abundance.
Unlimited wisdom.
Unlimited power.
Unlimited love.
Unlimited acceptance.
Unlimited wholeness.
Unlimited beingness.
Unlimited humility.

I welcome my human limitations and
I welcome my unlimited nature.

Both are true.
I welcome it all.

We are all learning and growing and
We are all divine and perfect.

We are both limited and unlimited.

We are one.
We are whole.

The earth is a school.
We are here for growth and learning.

And we are here to honor our human limitations and explore our unlimited capacities.

All at the same time.

I welcome my limitations and
I welcome the unlimited.

I welcome.
I welcome.
I welcome.

~Hayley Mermelstein

It was evening time and Thanksgiving was winding down. My once very perfectionistic nine year old niece was lying on the carpet and I was rubbing her back. I looked at her and felt compelled to say: 
 
“Ariana, you are a good person. “
 
There was a pause and then she replied: “Really? “
 
And I said: “Yes, really. You are a very good person. “
 
She paused again and then said: “That is nice to hear.”
 
There was another pause and I could feel her wheels turning. I then added: 
 
“You are not a perfect person. No one is a perfect. But you are a good person.”
 
Again, there was a pause and she replied: 
“My mom always says no one is perfect.”
 
That’s right I replied:
“ No one is perfect. But you still can be good.”
 
And then the conversation drifted and turned and it was time to brush teeth and one more snack and please go to bed already, etc…etc..
 
The next day came and we found ourselves in the living room, various conversations happening at once and my 9 year old niece was writing an essay about our family (she is learning to write essays in school.). There was a paragraph for her mom, a paragraph for me and a paragraph for her grandmother (otherwise known as Bubby.). And then there was her conclusion. 
 
I thought I’d share here conclusion here:
 
“All in all, I have a great family and everyone is smart, kind and talented. They are good people. You can’t be perfect, but you can be good.”
 
I guess she was listening. I thought to myself as I read her essay.
 
They say that the only person we are ever talking to is ourself. So I guess this was one of my Thanksgiving messages as well: 
 
You can’t be perfect, but you can be good.
 
And lest you think I had the perfect Thanksgiving with interesting conversation and well written essays, it wasn’t perfect. There was even a moment where I dug a cake cover out of the trash to everyone’s horror and dismay.
 
Thanksgiving wasn’t perfect. But it was good.
 
Have a nice week everyone!

Sincerely,

Hayley Mermelstein
 
 

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

Take a moment now and deeply welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I let go of my resistance to what is.
I let go of my resistance to what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

When I welcome what is I become calm.
My calm leads to clarity.

And so for today:

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I welcome it to the table as if I had personally invited it.
For today I deeply welcome what is.

I welcome what is and
I am aware of what shows up differently when I show up differently.

I welcome what is and
I am aware of what changes when I change.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

Embody it.
Feel it.

Become it.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

When I welcome what is, I become calm.
When I welcome what is, clarity is a natural biproduct.

I welcome what is without trying to change what is.
I welcome what is without trying to fix what is.

I welcome what is without trying to control what is.
I simply welcome what is.

This is my affirmation for today.
This is my embodiment for today.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I welcome what is and I am aware of what shows up differently when I show up differently.

I welcome what is and I am aware of what changes when I change.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I let go of my resistance to what is.
I let go of my resistance to what is.

I welcome what is without trying to change what is.
I welcome what is without trying to fix what is.

I welcome what is without trying to control what is.
I simply welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

Become the embodiment of:
I welcome what is.

As always see what shows up differently when you show up differently.
Be aware of what changes when you change.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

I deeply welcome what is.
I deeply welcome what is.

I welcome what is.
I welcome what is.

~Hayley Mermelstein
From: The Power of Affirmations

A psychic looked me in the eye not too long ago and said: You used to be arrogant and now you are humble. Do you understand?

There was a long pause and then I replied: Yes, yes I do. I understand completely.

And as I answered I reflected back on my life. I had a subtle arrogance in my younger years. Why is everyone so stupid? How could they do that? I wondered quietly to myself.

I wondered this until I too discovered the challenge of being human and made my own mistakes which took me years to recover from.

The process was painful and humbling. Life is still humbling. It is so tempting to become arrogant especially when things are going our way. But I have found that there is a danger in arrogance. Life seems to favor the humble. When I get arrogant I get the feeling that life feels a need to remind me that I don’t have ultimate control and that everything can change in an instant.

I was reminding myself of all this this morning. I was feeling good. Things have been working out for me lately. It was then I reminded myself: Stay humble. Stay humble. Be appreciative. Be thankful. Be careful not to slide into arrogance. Life is up and down, back and forth. Sometimes the stars are with you and sometimes life brings unexpected challenges. Stay humble. Your life works better when you are in humility.

And so today, I wrote an affirmation for myself about humility. To remind myself of how I want to go through my day. I thought I’d share it here in case you too are working on staying in humility as well.

I am filled with humility.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Feel it.
Embody it.

Be it.

Be humility.
Be the embodiment of humility.

Allow every cell of your body to be filled with humility.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

I am humble.
I am appreciative.

I am grateful.
I am kind.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

There is a danger to arrogance.
And so I embody humility,

Every day I practice humility.
Every day I remind myself to be humble.
Every day I embody humility.

I do not have ultimate control.
But for the grace of God go i.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Learn to be humble.
Not a false humility that hides a secret arrogance.

Learn to embody a true humility that understands that the earth is a school and we have come for growth, we have come for learning and that no one is exempt.

Be appreciative for what you have.
Be grateful.

But also be filled with humility.
Humility is your greatest protection.

When you are arrogant then one of your life lessons becomes to learn humility. This is not an easy lesson.

And so embody humility today.

Be humility.
Be compassion for the human condition.

Be appreciation.
Be love.

Do not judge.
Do not be arrogant.

But for the grace of God go I.
Everything can change in a moment.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Embody it.
Become it.

Be it.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Take a moment now and affirm:

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Be aware of what shows up differently when you show up differently.

So often we wait for the external world to change so that we can feel better.

For today embody humility and see what shows up differently when you show up differently.

Allow this to be your grand experiment with life.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility
I am filled with humility.

Again,

What shows up differently when you show up differently?
What changes when you change?

Really look.
Really notice.

Life is a school.
No one is exempt.

Be humble.
Be kind.

Be love.
And walk your path in humility.

Learn what you have come to learn and
you will be satisfied with your journey.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

Humility is my strength and
Humility is my protection.

I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.
I am filled with humility.

~Hayley Mermelstein